Tuesday, 20 July 2010


So this morning, while I was complaining about having to do completely normal things that EVERYONE does every day, like GO TO WORK, I totally forgot about one of the monsters I made a while ago. To be fair it was 7am and I was only halfway through brew number 1. Anyway, this is the best one I think I've made so far, apart from possibly my dad's one.

Yeah, it's this.

It's Jim. He's Emily's boyfriend. He was fun to make. He wears ripped jeans and pirate bandanas and shit and has a sweet beard.

A story. About thirteen million years ago when Emily asked Jim if he wanted to be a monster, he asked if he could have an accessory. Specifically, a pallet. Not an artist's palette, or even a palate, but a wooden pallet. So I rose to the challenge! Yeah I did!

You KNOW I love making accessories for the monsters. It's fun. Also, I used to work for Chep UK for ages, a few years ago. If you don't know who they are, you need to be ashamed, they make pallets. My job was to take phone calls from lorry drivers who were trying to collect them from supermarkets and stuff, and who couldn't for whatever reason. Then I had to phone up the supermarkets and shout at them, then I had to phone the drivers back and say, okay just leave. It was the stupidest job ever. Actually it was fine. The hardest part was trying to explain to other people what exactly I did all day.

ANYWAY. In a sort of ludicrous tribute to my old job, I decided to give Jim a Chep pallet. Chep pallets are blue. Here's one.

In case you couldn't visualise a blue pallet. I am really spoon-feeding you guys. Sooo... this is what I came up with.

It's EXACTLY the same and shut up.

It buttons neatly onto the underside of Jim's arm so he can carry it around and discard it as he jolly well pleases.

Look how bloody happy he is.

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